i have the ability to fall in and out of like way too quickly… easily turned on & off… that can be a good & a bad thing, both a blessing and a curse, but right now it’s bad. i’m finally talking to that poet guy (i’ve been liking him since october), but for some reason today, i feel different. i don’t know, i can’t explain it. it’s scary though because we’ve gotten hella personal & close over this winter break & i don’t want to go back to school knowing i don’t feel the same way about him as he does me. fuck!
i have until january 9th to get my shit together.
For the past however many days, I’ve been listening to Solange’s TRUE album.
Shit, I love her.
I have finals next week. I studied a little bit today, may get back to it later on… whatever.
There’s this guy I like; he’s a poet. That’s sexy as fuck. I saw him last night, but my
balls shriveled up, stomach dropped & I didn’t speak. I’m a cunt, I know. He & this other guy I kind of used to fuck w have the same name, though. That’s… I don’t know how to feel about that, but that’s what nicknames are for.
I don’t know.
Sometimes, I just want to walk up to people & be like, “I like you.” It’s not that simple, though. Is it even ‘okay’ to do shit like that? Either way, fear diminishes courage. & strength. I’m starting to realize that.